"Old acquaintances don’t know my recent situation, new acquaintances don’t know my past. My present shouldn’t be known by old acquaintances, and my past shouldn’t be told to new acquaintances. Even if you have read countless people, no one else is exactly like me." - Eileen Chang, "Love in a Fallen City"


Do you ever have this feeling? As we grow older, it becomes increasingly difficult to make genuine friends. It's not that we don't want to, but rather, it feels a bit troublesome. We're reluctant to say more and even more reluctant to get hurt. Today, let's talk about some reflections after entering society.

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I once talked with friends about how, as we age, we seem less inclined to meet new people. It's because we have too much to explain. We've experienced so much in life that it's hard to digest it all.

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As a result, after encountering countless people, we often feel exhausted and frequently worry about feeling lonely. We all hope to meet a true friend, but it seems we have to explain too much and share too much pain before that friendship can develop.

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Consequently, we choose to close off our hearts. In this era of globalization, with technology becoming more advanced, we should have more opportunities to meet friends. However, the quantity and quality of friendships seem to grow at different rates. We're like what sociologist Sherry Turkle describes as being "alone together."

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Just like the lyrics of Lauv's "Modern Loneliness" say: "Modern loneliness, we're never alone / But always depressed, yeah / Love my friends to death / But I never call and I never text, yeah." Modern loneliness seems to be like this. We don't feel particularly lonely, but we're always somewhat disheartened. There are so many ways to contact friends, but we've never really cared about them.

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Do any of you have similar feelings? As we grow older, we become more reluctant to open up because we don't want to get hurt again.

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